Lessons. Weirdmen receive slack, suburban breeders confront the stark fist of
removal ... major drug pusher with total impunity and societal ... How to score with
Gourmet Guitar Lessons Finally, in this age of specialization, there are now offerings for the musical gourmandizer who must have it all! Collegial Proto-Yuppie Pseudo-Punk Nihilistic thrashings and rejection of everything and still make 260K your first year out of college–have your razor blade and eat it too! Learn about hard core thrust funds and Dead Kennedy money markets.
New-Aging Muzak Thorazine implant included in lesson price. Creative droning, Windham Swilling, learn to make your own guitar strings from wheat grass sprouts, play with non-feeling to create unappealing healing, we are ass holistic as you can stand.
Techno-Geek Rock Church of the Sub-Genius Anti-Music Lessons Weirdmen receive slack, suburban breeders confront the stark fist of removal, grok the true pipe of Bob! Send one dollar to . . .
Corporate Rock How to become one of the Miller beer bands or how you too can work for a major drug pusher with total impunity and societal approval! Learn the pleasures of ownership . . . them owning you!
Rock Life Seminar All you need to know about blood transfusions, brain/whammy bar interfacing, how to keep one's stomach upon seeing/smelling dressing rooms in local rock clubs, advanced study in "the music business" aka careers in non-music.
How to midi your guitar strap, pencil necking made easy! How to score with your drum machine's girlfriend, dweebishnerdo ornithomorphic head bobbing demonstrations, lesson taugh in Pascal or assembly language only.
Lesbo-Castrato Power Metaloid Psychofolk Subverting the musical phallocracy by inverting edible rexes while diverting estrogenic hormones. Mary Daly g-string bending techniques, wymyn only, please!
New Genre Half-Breeds Stylosynthobscuritism: heavy lentil, litemental, polka politopunk, rockarmadillobilly, klezmer top-40, regressive rock, afrosurf, greek-funk.
Disclaimer: Any relation or similarity to the real world is completely unintentional, coincidental and ingenuous. I didn't mean it, honest! I was just joking! I really do like all of you! Sam Davis Sam Davis Sam Davis Sam Davis Sam Davis Sam Davis www.samdavis.com www.samdavis.com www.samdavis.com www.samdavis.com www.samdavis.com www.samdavis.com Guitar & Bass Guitar & Bass Guitar & Bass Guitar & Bass Guitar & Bass Guitar & Bass 617-497-0830 617-497-0830 617-497-0830 617-497-0830 617-497-0830 617-497-0830