Mar 27, 2013 ... Newsletter of Milton Keynes Quakers ... collection of such talks, which we are
about to publish, 'The Quaker .... Metalworking is a new course.
Meeting Points
March 2013
MEETING POINTS Newsletter of Milton Keynes Quakers
No 27 March 2013
Though it's now March, the winter has not entirely left us. Whilst it can be trying, it does have its joys.
Quakers in Milton Keynes Quaker Centre 1 Oakley Gardens Downhead Park Milton Keynes MK15 9BH
Warden: Laura Weavers Telephone: 01908 604673 Email:
[email protected]
Clerk: Eva Barton, 2 Amherst Court, Duck Lane, Woburn, Bedfordshire, MK17 9PT Tel: 01525 290436
Email:
[email protected]
Meeting for Worship Sundays 10.30 – 11.30 am. Children welcome. Also on 1st & 3rd Weds. at 12.45 – 1.30 pm
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Editorial Welcome to the first newsletter of 2013. I hope you will find something of interest here. We've been privileged recently to hear Ann Limb's updated 'My Faith in Practice' talk and I found her title 'Untroubled by theology' very interesting. I have just written in the introduction to a collection of such talks, which we are about to publish, 'The Quaker way is deeply insightful in saying to us "what is most important is that you are honest in your dealings with yourself, not forcing yourself into any particular mould which many religious traditions demand. It is the experience which is prime—the words to articulate it may, or may not, come."' Notwithstanding that, we all strive for meaning and purpose in our lives and despite difficulties with pinning truth down, there is a real sense in which participating in the shared endeavours of a (S)spirit-led community can be deeply nurturing and supportive. Amongst the responses to the questionnaire put out by elders last year (see page 16), was the following which brought me up with a start because I had never thought of a Quaker Meeting in quite this way before: what I particularly value is the intent to create goodness. I think and hope that this intent and the meaning it brings forth also brings forth us, and in particular, me. [my italics] For me, this resonates with Robert Barclay's experience that on entering a Quaker Meeting he felt ' a secret power which touched my heart; and as I gave way unto it I found the evil weakening in me and the good raised up; and so I became thus knit and united unto them, hungering more and more after the increase of this power and life'. [QF&P 19.21] And surely this is entirely in line with what Paul wrote in his letter to the Galatians that 'the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness' [5:22]. I very strongly suspect that in churches which still require its followers to adhere to a creed, it is the ethical power of the spiritual life for many people that continues to give meaning and purpose despite the barriers of credal language and what are often experienced as out-dated conceptions. The truth is that most of us benefit from sharing together in this spiritual quest and provided we can be honest with ourselves and retain our integrity, we can nurture and take inspiration from each other. Eva Barton writes in this issue about her recent weekend at the Quaker Nontheists Network Conference (see pages 7 and 8). What has fascinated me was her account of a small group discussion in which 'someone speculated what would happen if the theists in our Meetings, those who are comfortable with God language, were all ‘converted’ to nontheism. The thought was expressed, and not contradicted, that in that case Quaker Meetings would soon no longer exist! This was based on the comment that if you lose a language you lose much more than the language itself.' Don Rowe Editor
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News and Reports
Warden's Waffle
some of the things I do as part of my job. Some days can be very busy and others are quiet. I plucked a ‘random day’ out of the air and this was how it went.
Progress Report. In the last newsletter I wrote a gentle reminder about the procedures for locking up the Meeting House on Sundays, (which included additional tasks such as checking that taps and lights were switched off). I am happy to report that Friends have been much more mindful and that the Meeting House has been left tidy, ecofriendly and secure for the last two months, so a big thank you to all and as my school reports used to say…keep up the good work!
Wednesday 9th January.
7.30-8am – Mop and clean bathrooms and kitchen.
8am- Receive a delivery of toilet rolls, hand towels and Cleaning Supplies
8.30am - Check that heating is turned up in the rooms that are to be used, empty bins and make sure that rooms are tidy. Put lights on and unlock main door.
Write up the names of groups that will be using the centre on the white board.
9am – Text Chris (pre-school manager) to ask her to clear the Children’s room when the preschool finishes, as Quakers need to use it for the Panto rehearsal.
9.05am – Toddler Time session starts in Main Room.
9.45-10am – check and reply to emails.
10-11am – Clean Pre-school room and Main Meeting room (after Toddler Time leaves).
11am-11.30am – Further work on emails and answer 2 x phone calls. Sort through post and distribute.
12.30pm – Counsellor arrives for her sessions – Quick chat with her.
Important Diary Date. On that positive note, may I remind Friends that our Annual Spring Clean will be held on Saturday 20th April, 10am-2pm. This is an opportunity to come together as a community and demonstrate appreciation and care for the Meeting House by giving it a thorough scrub down. Other jobs include, making cups of tea and morale boosting! As someone that spends approx. 9 hours a week cleaning the premises, it makes a real difference to me to have that extra support. A day in the life of…. The work of a Warden is unusual and varied, so I thought you might be interested to know about 3
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2.55pm – Doorbell - Room hirer drops off leaflets at my front door for upcoming event. Distribute these.
4.20pm – Phone call - Booking Enquiry.
5pm - Mop, Hoover and clean Children’s room in preparation for Panto Rehearsal Group.
March 2013
6.30pm – Drop off invoice for user group in Library.
7pm – Circles of Support arrive. Followed shortly by Panto Rehearsal Group and Dawoodi Bohra Faith Community.
10.30pm – Lock up and check that all taps & lights are off. Radiators turned down. And everything is left as it should be.
5.40pm – Phone call – Somebody requiring an email address of a Friend within Meeting. Laura Weavers
5.55pm – Doorbell – Room hirer wishes to make further bookings and check availability.
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Third Age Cohousing Project The progress of our scheme sometimes appears slow, sometimes much faster, but it is definitely sure. At our January Quarterly meeting (open to members and those seriously considering membership) we took the decision to raise £10,000 during this year in voluntary loans. This money will be needed to reach some of the targets we have set ourselves. We have done as much as we can on our own on legal and financial issues. We feel reasonably confident now about the sort of specific questions we need to ask as purposeful and informed clients hiring professional help. Our needs are complicated, since our Cohousing scheme is planned to include rental dwellings as well as owner occupied, and perhaps shared ownership.
planned for 12th April, on the eve of our next Quarterly Meeting. We are also persuaded that a dummy run, imagining and designing what a cohousing scheme like the one we want might look like and cost, should be a very useful exercise. It will probably take a couple of days (probably in the Summer), be a test of our negotiating skills and perhaps a reality check! If all this sounds interesting and you are approaching or over 50 (it is a Senior Cohousing scheme), please ask Rob Paton, Denise Rowe, Lee Taylor or Ines Russell for more information. We have a leaflet, and would like this to reach out to others who may be interested. Regardless of age, we would also be glad to hear from anyone able and willing to invest in our scheme. For anyone interested in cohousing generally, UK Cohousing has an informative website which is www.cohousing.co.uk
Another introductory day (our third) was held in February, attended by 9 interested people - four of whom were from our Meeting. We have 17 members so far - and rising, with four further applications to be considered by the Management Committee at its March meeting. A social event is
Ines Russell 4
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News from Hlekweni and Friends of Hlekweni A strong group of trainees graduated in December, and another cohort in excess of 65 started in January. Metalworking is a new course on offer.
teaches this course for giving us this opportunity). We are pleased with the clean, fresh images that students have produced, and hope to incorporate some of their work (one example is below left) into our plans to spruce up our charity's 'image'.
The drought was very tough in the latter part of 2012. At last the rains have come but these have been spasmodic torrential downpours - also problematic for sustainable agriculture.
We have made three applications for grants - to QPSW and to two Trusts; one is for updating equipment. We were delighted to encounter a Trust that would entertain this kind of infrastructure building.
Trustees have made a number of grants, including one to MATWID, a charity which supports widows and guardians in Matabeleland. MATWID's Director is a Quaker, Sipho Nsimbi, based in Bulawayo. We were delighted to get a significant grant from a Friend in another AM for work with children, and Lee will be following this up in her forthcoming visit.
I am going to southern Africa from mid March through to early April and will be travelling to Hlekweni with Jessica Richards (Barnet and Johannesburg meeting). John and Kelitha Schmid will be taking us out to Kezi District where the Zimbabwe Food Relief Scheme operates, primarily to visit schools there. I want to assess the impact of our little 'send a book in a jiffy bag and get a school library going' scheme. It may be possible to get to Harare to see the orphanage supported by Quakers (strictly out of FoH boundaries, but so very worth supporting). A couple of long road trips later will see us at Central and Southern Africa Yearly Meeting, near Cape Town. We are beginning to put together a history of Hlekweni and perhaps the most exciting recent development was the discovery of a slim volume entitled 'Letters from Zimbabwe' by Andrew Wainright who went to Hlekweni as a young volunteer in 1971, two years after it was founded. The Wainwright family are trustees of the Scurrah Wainright Trust to which we are applying. It is one of the few charities which specifically lists an interest in Zimbabwe. On Andrew's tragic death two years later, the family established the Andrew Wainwright Reform Trust in his memory.
Don Rowe has been working with a group of design students at Reading University on a new brand/logo for Friends of Hlekweni (thanks to Sara Chapman of Harpenden Meeting who
Coming from a left-wing, and Methodist family, Andrew, as revealed in his letters, was an energetic, open-minded young man willing to get 5
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March 2013 Continuing to look at the present and more recent past situation - over the Land Tenure Act, the churches at first stood up in a united front. The [UDI] government obviously took this very seriously and spent a lot of effort and cunning to dupe the Church which they did pretty totally only Bulawayo Monthly Meeting has refused to register of all the churches in Rhodesia. [...] But few Rhodesians believe in equality. They may see a time in the future when the African will achieve a high standard of living, but they will be sure to see that theirs is higher still. [...] As independent black Africa gets more aggressive, Rhodesians will hardly become more enlightened. As the Rhodesian Africans get more desperate, the Europeans' fear of giving them majority Rule will increase."
'stuck in', optimistic and idealistic about the future, and trenchant in his views on both Hlekweni and Zimbabwe. March 1971 "I dropped out of the gorgeous blue sky on Friday at Bulawayo airport from Johannesburg. It's now Thursday so I'll have been here almost a week incredible. Anyway, Hlekweni is about ten miles out of Bulawayo and I was ferried from the centre to the farm by one of the family, and we dropped in on a youth club where another volunteer is working. We chatted there to the teenagers and sang things like 'When the Roll is Called up Yonder, I'll be There' and 'We Shall Overcome', which is banned here. Eventually we arrived at the ranch and met the director Roy Henson and his wife Irene who live there with two of their children. Roy looks somewhat like W.H. Auden and he and Irene are in their fifties. They came out from a farm in Cambridge and moved in at Hlekweni about three years ago.
We have some free copies of Andrew's book for anyone who is interested to read more. Lee Taylor, clerk to Friends of Hlekweni
"March 28th. The trainees were all very excited by the pictures you sent of the Women's Lib demonstration in London. They reckon they would all be fired on by the army if they demonstrated. [...] I haven't really been around the town yet but have been in each week-end to play football with the Hlekweni Harriers as the only paleface. The town appears to be split down the middle, the 50,000 Europeans on the Park and Fountains side and the 230,000 African in less cleanly-kept, dusty, straggling rows and blocks of flats in the townships on the other side of town. There are also 8,000 coloureds.
Marieke Clarke (Oxford Meeting, a staunch Friends of Hlekweni supporter) is gathering material for a history of Hlekweni, and has done a number of interviews, and painstaking research in various libraries. Marieka has also published a biography of Lozikeyi Dlodlo, Queen Regent of the Ndebele people. By 1890, the Ndebele had for 50 years been settled in the fertile and well watered upland areas of Matabeleland with their capital at Bulawayo. But in 1893, Queen Lozikeyi’s husband King Lobhengula was driven out of his kingdom by force of arms because Cecil Rhodes and the British South Africa Company believed that Matabeleland was rich in gold and diamonds. The white soldiers had, even before taking part in the invasion, demanded huge areas of the Ndebeles’ land for farming and ranching. After Conquest, the white men annexed the fertile well watered land and drove or forcibly removed the Ndebele from their homes to remote dry areas. This process continued into the 1950s. Some Quaker projects in Matabeleland, including Friends of Hlekweni, try to support and enhance the fragile lifestyles of the present population of Matabeleland, most of whom still live in the worst watered areas. For a copy of Marieke Clarke's book, see Lee Taylor or Don Rowe
[...] The new Land Tenure Act, which is so important, is a bit dubious as interpretation is left very much to the government's discretion. Even so, Hlekweni certainly contravenes the basic spirit of it. Theoretically, I cannot visit, let alone sleep in, an African home - though in practice I think it will be possible which will be useful as people come and go at Hlekweni from all over the country and they would be very hospitable. Some of them are ex-restrictees and very interesting - members of the banned Zimbabwe African People's Union. July 16th 6
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THE NONTHEIST FRIENDS NETWORK (NFN) Eva Barton Yes, you read that right, there is such a network which last year was accepted by Britain Yearly Meeting (BYM) as a recognised, listed, informal group. I attended their 3rd annual gathering at Woodbrooke from 1-3 March 2013. The theme was: Living at the Wave’s Edge (F&P 20.06). The Network’s aims, which have been variously set out, include:
creation for creative humans. Michael is very well read and introduced us to a series of fascinating sounding books which I list at the end of this note. He was impressed with the Whoosh epistle about which we heard from Paul Parker, the BYM recording clerk, on his visit to us last year. Michael commented favourably about the Progressive Christianity Network Britain (www.pcnbritain.org.uk) which is the British arm of a world-wide network of progressive Christian thinkers, leading groups into intellectually rigorous exploration of issues of faith and its application in modern life. He also mentioned the recent opening of an Atheist Church in London.
(i) providing a supportive framework for Friends with an agnostic, humanist, atheist or related world-view, and those who experience religion as a wholly human creation; (ii) joining with all Friends who are interested in exploring varieties of nontheism as a recognised strand within modern diverse liberal Quakerism; and
The week-end was well organised by the NFN steering group, chaired by David Boulton. Woodbrooke was as always its welcoming self. There were numerous opportunities for group discussions. After all the words I listened to I was left with two abiding memories.
(iii) strengthening and celebrating theological and spiritual diversity by promoting dialogue at all levels within the Religious Society of Friends.
One came from the ministry of quite an aged, strongly convinced nontheist Quaker in the Meeting for Worship in the Quiet room. He said that he had gathered, when he had gone to Edgbaston Meeting with the director of Woodbrooke, that there was increasingly less ministry in the Meetings around Woodbrooke. He found that baffling. Ministry is supposed to come from God speaking through us. Can we deduce that God is less inclined to speak through Friends than heretofore? Or are they less good in hearing God? Also, ever since he became convinced that God does not exist as such, he still felt that same irresistible urge to get up and minister. This also baffled him.
A Constitution will be presented at the next annual gathering when a decision will be made on the stated aims. There were 52 F/friends at this gathering, ranging from Aberdeen to Cornwall and including 2 people who did not attend a Quaker Meeting. The total membership of the NFN has been static at 102 for the last 2 years. The proportion of men in the gathering seemed to be somewhat larger than is normally seen at Quaker courses and gatherings (there were 45 % men). I had associated such radical thinking with younger people but most appeared to be well into their sixties which, of course, tallies with what we see in many Meetings. According to some members, the existence of the Nontheist Network will take away an obstacle to people joining the Society of Friends.
The second came from one of the small group discussions when someone speculated about what would happen if the theists in our Meetings, those who are comfortable with God language, were all ‘converted’ to nontheism. The thought was expressed, and not contradicted, that in that case Quaker Meetings would soon no longer exist! This was based on the comment that if you lose a language you lose much more than the language itself. One of the
The keynote address was given by Michael Wright of Middlesbrough Meeting. Funnily enough, he describes himself as a Christian. He was a C of E vicar until two years ago when he became a Quaker. His opening statement was that religion was a human 7
Meeting Points reasons apart from curiosity, that I had come to this gathering was to find out if being in a nontheist group made me feel somewhat chill as I had felt in a Sea of Faith group as well as in a humanist group. Maybe
Contact Eva if you would like her to send you Michael Wright’s keynote address. Michael Wright’s recommended books were: A Just Church by Chris Howson, Christianity without God by Lloyd Geering, With or without God by Gretta Vosper,
March 2013 the reason I felt quite warm was the underlying acceptance, and indeed appreciation of our theists! I will finish with a limerick which was produced in our evening of Quaker Laughter on Saturday evening:
There was a nontheist from Dent who didn’t know quite what it meant. We tried to explain again and again
Amen by Gretta Vosper, Living the Questions by David M Felten and Jeff Procter-Murphy,
till he gave up enquiring for Lent.
Religion for Atheists by Alain de Botton.
Sinnerella: a Quaker Panto comes to town
At the Christmas New Year's Party, there was much boo-ing and hissing as the ugliest of Ugly Sisters (Michael Grabowski, Don Rowe) tried to prevent poor Sinnerella (Maggie Cook) from escaping her life of servitude on less than the minimum wage. Happily the services of the Fairy Princess Inestimable (above) came to her aid. Carmel Schmid was a campaigner for truth and justice, Ann Limb played the very forgetful Baron Stoneybroke while Denise Rowe whipped the audience to a 8 frenzy of participation. Hooray! How we laffed!
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MEETING FOR SUFFERINGS February 2013 David Connal, our Area Meeting (AM) representative at Meeting for Sufferings (MfS) attended the MfS residential weekend at Woodbrooke Study Centre in February. This provided more time than is possible at the usual Saturday meetings for such factors as getting to know one another at a deeper level spiritually and for exploring the role of MfS within the Yearly Meeting. Below is a brief summary of a number of issues which were sent from AMs to MfS:
Network and many of the Network’s meetings are hosted at Friends House. Friends are encouraged by QPSW to sign the petition on the website. Also Friends might like to attend a Meeting for Worship at RAF Waddington and visit the peace camp there. RAF Waddington, near Lincoln, is the base from which the British drones are controlled. For more information, please contact Sam Walton, QPSW’s Peace and Disarmament Programme Manager on Tel: 020 7663 1067 or email:
[email protected].
Spiritual healing: Further to Luton and Leighton AM’s minute of September 12, in which we asked Meeting for Sufferings to consider the inclusion of spiritual healing in a future Framework for Action, a similar minute was received from Thaxted AM. MfS will be returning to this subject at its July 2013 Meeting.
Concern about welfare reform: Wirral and Chester AM sent a minute urging QPSW to focus urgently on the effect of the upcoming changes to the benefit system on low-income working and non-working people. AMs are encouraged to engage with this issue and Friends are asked to ‘hold in the light’ those whom these reforms will seriously impoverish.
Drone warfare: A minute about drone warfare was received from South East London AM. Quaker Peace and Social Witness is a founder member of the Drones Campaign
Gloria Dobbin, alternate Area Meeting representative on Meeting for Sufferings
Can you help at the Meeting House?
Wanted : News about Old Friends
When our Warden is on leave we ask others in the Meeting if they are willing and able to take on some of the duties that would normally be undertaken by the warden. Might you be able to give service to the Meeting in one of the following ways from time to time?
The Overseers at Meeting are trying to make contact with Members on our Meeting’s records who no longer live in Milton Keynes and with whom we have had no contact for some years. If anyone has any ‘news’ about any of the following Friends then please pass it on to any of the overseers. Many thanks.
1. Opening the Meeting House in the morning (8.30 am on a weekday, later at weekends) 2. Closing the Meeting House (this might be as late as 10.30 pm but could be earlier) 3. Cleaning the Meeting House – perhaps for a few hours on alternate days (there would be remuneration for this) 4. Putting the chairs out for Meeting on Sunday morning
Last known living outside the UK: David Barlow (France), Ian Noah (Sierra Leone). Last known living in the UK:
We would like to compile a list of Friends who would be willing to be contacted if the need arises. Please let Laura Weavers know if this is something you would like to do. Many thanks. Gloria Dobbin, Finance & Property Committee
Roland Bell (Northants), Stella Wentworth (Oxfordshire), Raymond Ward (no details), Jane Funnell (no details) Jennifer Roper, Convenor of Overseers 9
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For the diary Milton Keynes QLGF meeting
Preparation for Yearly Meeting
The Quaker Lesbian and Gay Fellowship is a national welcoming and supportive group for Quakers of all sexualities and those who, while not Quakers, are in general sympathy with the Quaker thought and lifestyle. We aim to promote dialogue and a deeper mutual understanding (and to have fun). Enquirers are very welcome! Local groups are mixed gender, autonomous and make their own programme of events and do not, as a rule, require members to belong to the fellowship at a national level.
In preparation for Yearly Meeting, we are asked to think about the three questions below and submit our responses to the organising committee early in May. How have you discerned the right way forward in your life? What experiences have you had of Quaker meetings being guided by the Spirit when making decisions? What do you value about the ways in which Friends work together? These discussions will be held on 17th April and 1st May at 7.30 pm in the Meeting House. All welcome, whether or not you hope to go to Yearly Meeting.
The first meeting of the MK QLGF group takes place on th March 17 , after meeting for worship, after which discussions will be held on how, when and whether to pursue this new group. We aim to have a balanced mixture of social activities and intelligent debate and discussions. For more details contact Peter Leeson.
Letting our Lives Speak: a series of discussions 7.30 pm at the Meeting House
Fancy a Good Read? Book Group meets on the third Thursday of each month to discuss a range of fiction and non-fiction titles. All welcome, whether or not you've read the book! 21st March: Decline and Fall by Chris Mullen
Thursdays 14th March, 28th March: MONEY
18th April: The Infinite Plan by Isabel Allende
11th April - all at 7.30 pm: Politics and Public Life
16th May: The Pursued by C.S.Forrester 20th June: Jigsaw by Sybille Bedford
Milton Keynes Food Bank Following the success of the three-week collection before Christmas, the Meeting decided at the January Business Meeting to continue to support this valuable local cause. Therefore Friends are encouraged to continue donating food and leaving it in the box in the hallway. It is currently being re-distributed to the Food bank each fortnight and they are very grateful for our support. Financial contributions are also welcome. By cheque: Cheques should be made out to ‘MK Community Foundation’ with ‘Food Bank’ written on the back. Cheques/Donation forms can be sent to: MK Community Foundation, Acorn House, 381 Midsummer Boulevard, Central Milton Keynes, MK9 3HP.Online: Donations by debit or credit card or Paypal can be made at:justgiving.com/miltonkeynescommunityfoundation/Donate or through MKCF website: mkcommunityfoundation.co.uk
All donations given to MK Community Foundation before 31st March, via text and online and all cheques to ‘MK Community Foundation’ with ’Food Bank’ referenced will go back to The Food Bank having been matched pound for pound up to £10,000! 10 Wil you spare just £3 per month to help ensure our sustainability in this tough economic climate? The Food Bank is aiming to encourage 1000 people to donate just £3 per month.
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And other stuff... Untroubled by theology: six decades of varieties of religious experience My Faith in Practice by Ann Limb The first decade: ‘each one of us is unique, precious, a child of God’.
chances and experiences that resulted from this and have felt impelled throughout my life to try to do something about this.
I was born into a home with no books, no religion, and scant regard for moral purpose, the life of the imagination or the concept and value of 'the other' - whether defined in terms of spirit or community.
The summer I turned not quite four-and-a-half a time forever in my memory filled with sunshine - witnessed what some people might call ' a mystical experience' but what I think of as my first emotional encounter with a sense that there might be a world - or worlds - beyond the boundaries of my own existence. As I sat on the wooden stairs of our half-finished semi-detached house, eyes closed and breath held, I found myself thinking 'What if this is not the real world?' 'What if all this does not exist?' The sensation was visceral - and the relief palpable - and both feelings have effortlessly reconstructed themselves subsequently at numerous unbidden moments in the ensuing fifty-five years of my life. From that day onwards, I began to say the Lord’s Prayer, each night before I went to sleep – something that has never left me.
It was the mid 1950s, inner city Manchester Moss Side to be precise - and my father disabled, uneducated and with few skills save those learned through his merchant naval experiences during the war, had with my mother's assistance and native intelligence, acquired his own butcher's shop. I lived there until I was four years old, when my sister was born (in the back bedroom behind the shop) with my Mum and Dad and a dog whose name and breed I do not recall so traumatized was I by the fact that he (it must have been a 'he') ate my drum stick and sicked it up all over the kitchen floor. Of course I was blissfully unaware of the surrounding grimness and grime - or for that matter the crime! Moss Side remains to this day one of this country's poorest communities - a gangland riven by racial tensions and gun and knife-related criminal behaviour. Neither had I any idea back in the mid 1950's that where I lived was rapidly filling with families who had come to England from other parts of the world and had different coloured skin from mine. My best friend was Peter and we played together in the back alley. To this day when I think of him I don't feel or see a little black boy. I am, however, painfully aware of the inequalities in our different life
So faith came to me, just like my little sister had done a few months earlier, in the summer of 1957. The Quaker phrase (had I known it then) that most aptly summarizes this decade of my life is
Remember that each one of us is unique, precious, a child of God. The practice of my faith has taken a lifetime to evolve - and the journey was not straightforward. The second decade: ‘Seeking that of God in
everyone’ I started school in the September of 1957. It was an old Church of England primary school 11
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attached to the parish Church of Norbury. In fact, I had been christened by my parents into the Church of England - an act of convention rather than belief on their part. I remember the school assemblies - the daily act of worship - and most of all, the services in the church itself. We went for all the main Christian events - Ash Wednesday, Lent, Easter, Whitsun, Harvest Festival and, of course, Christmas. The church nativity and carol service had a profound effect on me. My memories are of an awesome combination of candlelight, natural darkness, beautiful music and singing and prayer in a language I couldn't understand with my head but to which my heart was (and remains) instinctively drawn.
this to myself of course – as there was no one to share this with and nowhere for the thought to go. It lay buried deep inside until it was ready and able to emerge decades later. Imperceptibly (to me at any rate), it nonetheless infused and informed my behaviour throughout the next two decades – a period in my life I came to regard in hindsight as spiritually ‘ my wilderness years’. The Quaker phrase that captures this decade of my life would perhaps be ‘Seeking that of God in everyone’ for that is what I believe I was naturally inclined to do as a child, even if this was not an act of articulated will and - what I consciously strive to do now in my Quaker life.
To this day I still love to go into English parish churches. I enjoy the centuries old liturgy, the predictable ritual, the hymn singing and the deeply moving poetry of the King James Bible. When, some years ago, I was working in Cambridge, I would go whenever I could to evensong at one of the colleges. Whenever in my current life I find I am around Westminster at the time of evensong, I pop into the Abbey and join the congregation. My sister refers to this as 'karaoke for Quakers'. Whilst I would not wish to worship in this way each Sunday (and given recent decisions on women bishops and gay marriage, no person of sound mind and egalitarian disposition could these days own up to membership of the Church of England) I retain a deep-seated fondness for the CofE and, through my work decades later as Chair of the National Council of Faiths and Beliefs, found myself frequently at Church House in London and engaging with some excellent people from the Anglican church.
The third decade: ‘living adventurously and
letting my life speak’ Passing the 11plus, going to a state girls grammar school – in Cheshire in the 1960s and on to read for a degree in French at a respectable red brick university, Liverpool, in the first part of the 1970s, (the first person in my family to go to university) were life experiences that my parents and grandparents could only have dreamed of…but probably didn’t, though they did support me and my sister in our endeavours - and for this I am truly grateful. My teenage years, followed by a period of intense energy and action during my first ten years working in education, did not allow much time for reflection and the life of the spirit. Music, poetry, theatre, feminism and political activism began to fill up my interior spaces and consume my external life. I had flirted with the Methodist youth club in my early teens (disaster) and then humanism in my late teens and whilst at university (even won a national prize for an essay on humanism) but there was precious little that you could call religion in my life.
I withheld from everyone around me a deeper interior life (of the imagination? of the spirit?) that was developing inside me but which found no acceptable outward expression in everyday experiences. I didn’t (and don’t) think of myself as a ‘seeker’ but I did one day have a second ‘encounter with God' in the dining room of our house, aged about nine. The words ‘I think God is inside me ’ entered my consciousness. I kept
On the contrary, as my intellectual life expanded I found myself positively rejecting ‘organised’ or ‘established’ religions. The Pope’s views on the pill were plain barmy to a child of the free love, dope-smoking (yes I did inhale) sixties and 12
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seventies; a woman’s right to an abortion was a given to a devotee of ‘The Female Eunuch’.
very different place then – and at the age of 35, I too was in a very different place from the one I find myself in, 25 years later, as I turn 60. One of the little known facts about MK College in the late 1980s, however, was the heavy, nay disproportionate, preponderance of Quakers amongst the staff of the establishment. They soon made their presence felt – and so did I - and something I believe to be miraculous occurred! I met the Quakers or, perhaps, a better way of saying this would be that the Quakers found me.
In my twenties and thirties, therefore, I ploughed a furrow through the fields of the world of work without any overt ‘framework of values’ to guide, motivate, engage or challenge me. I had values, of course, (although where they came from I was never quite sure – that sense of ‘God inside me’?) - and I put these into practice in the way I conducted my life (protesting at Greenham Common and Moleswoth, campaigning for Green Peace and Friends of the Earth, doing my bit for the Labour party and the anti-apartheid movement) but I never articulated these values or took myself into places where I could voice them. Nor did I have a distinct ‘community of reference’ with whom to identify or relate, to test my values and beliefs against – outside my family, friends and work that is.
My appointment as college Principal was not evidence of a carefully planned career reaching its pinnacle. It was a mixture of happenstance and good luck – that also put me in the way of MK Quakers. Some of them Maggie Cook, Jennifer Roper, Irene Pugh, Lesley Grinstead and Anna Bretts are still in our meeting, others like Kate Holloway are in nearby meetings and some, like Pam Umbima, Jo Jaffrey, have And so, after a decade of rising now left MK but were part of through the educational ranks our meeting and MK College I had decided by then that I (part-time teacher in 1977 to between 1986-1996. One by wanted some of what they college Principal by 1987) a one, I got to know these folk self-professed ‘non believer’, it were evidently on. and discovered the invisible was the place and the people golden thread that connected that found me. The place was them and, as it happened, me to Milton Keynes and the people were the Quakers. a set of values and a way of being that is It was here where I came to realise that I had Quakerism. We met in our shared views on been ‘ living adventurously and letting my life integrity, responsibility, and something as simple speak’ as once again a Quaker phrase so as doing what you said you’d do! beautifully encapsulates this milestone in my Once I had made this connection, I could not journey. resist the appeal of finding out more about the Quakers as I sent away to Friends House for the book ‘What do Quakers believe?’ and read it The fourth decade: ‘ be open to new light, cover to cover at one sitting. I was instantly from whatever source it may come’ hooked and found myself saying – this is what I have believed all my life. I went to my first I came to Milton Keynes in 1986 to take up the meeting for worship in Oxford (because had I not post of Vice Principal, and then very soon taken to it I wouldn’t then have had to face my afterwards, Principal, of the FE College – Milton work colleagues – although I needn’t have Keynes College. I stayed in that post for almost worried on that score) and the love affair was ten years during which time, the college consummated. I have remained addicted - and expanded and developed significantly – as did I! I monogamous - ever since. I started coming to was the youngest ever person to be appointed to MK Meeting in 1991 and I became a member of the role of FE College Principal. Like the still the Society on my 40th birthday in February emerging city itself, Milton Keynes College was a 13
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1993. I marked the occasion by writing a prose poem called ‘ A Birthday Retreat’, which begins
by the then Labour government to deliver the rapidly evolving e-services learndirect, UK online, and Directgov.
For my 40th birthday, I gave myself the gift of God…
Whilst I loved the job – despite the incredibly long hours and ridiculously demanding schedules - and I was well regarded and well paid - there came a point when a predictable clash of culture, style, and values between me (a left-wing Quaker feminist) and the Ufi Chairman (a right-wing atheist chauvinist) was always going to result in a parting of the ways - with me, not the Chairman, leaving the ship.
My late 30s and my 40s - during the 1990s - were a very fertile and active period for me psychologically, spiritually, and emotionally. I went into therapy and whilst still undertaking a full time job as college principal, I trained as a psychodynamic therapist, working voluntarily three evenings a week at the Milton Keynes Pastoral Foundation; I served our meeting in an array of capacities including being (in no particular order) QCEA representative, co-clerk – with Mervyn – and a member of many committees including Nominations, and 25th Anniversary Committee, wrote letters to the Friend and, of course, the single most important earthly thing I’ll ever do – began a life of laughter, love and labour with my (now) civil partner Maggie.
Having lost my full-time job prematurely, it proved not at all straightforward to embark upon a portfolio career and getting on to the road turned out to be both tortuous and treacherous for me. It is only now with hindsight and learning from the last eight years integrated into my (I hope) continually evolving consciousness and that I can truly say I am thankful for what was at the time a sadistically bruising and shockingly horrid experience. One of my friends likened it to a sudden amputation, which is also how many of my former colleagues told me they experienced the loss of me as their leader.
I was glad I had had the presence of mind to take note of the approach, behaviours, and values of my work colleagues at the college who all turned out to have Quakerism in common. I realize now that I was ‘open to new light, from whatever source it may come’ although I did so more from an unconscious inner predisposition to such a state, as I didn’t know the Quaker phrase at the time.
For years after what felt to me like a ‘mortal blow’, I remained inwardly defeated, deeply depressed and, to return to the nautical analogy used above, utterly ‘at sea’, drifting along with no sense of purpose or direction. After yet another rejection (I had over a hundred in the end) for a seemingly simple and not very well paid nonexecutive role to which I was eminently suited and well qualified, I would bore Maggie silly with my endless questioning about why my gifts and talents were not being used more effectively in the world. None of this would have been perceptible to most people who dealt with me as, outwardly – and to all intents and purposes – I have filled my time over the last 8 years with a huge amount of activity and I generally look as if I have coped well.
The fifth decade: ‘think it possible you may be
mistaken’ In September 1996, I took on my second Principal’s job at Cambridge Regional College, which I loved. This meant living away from MK in the week and I was therefore not so available for service in our meeting - although I returned each weekend and continued to worship here. After almost five very fulfilling years in Cambridge, I was lured into what became my last full-time paid role, grandly entitled 'Group Chief Executive, University for Industry', a national educational role leading the organization set up
I realized at the time – and have been sustained by this throughout a long period of darkness and depression – that when something like this 14
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happens, it all depends on how we deal with it; whether we choose a path of bitterness, regret and recrimination or one of mercy, grace and forgiveness. During the last few years, I believe my spiritual development has been accelerated by the evident wrong and injustice that was done to me and that I have ultimately benefitted from not fighting it either head-on or in a headlong, headstrong manner.
particularly those operating in the field of social justice and working with the marginalized and forgotten in society. I am Chair of Trustees of the Helena Kennedy Foundation, the charity I founded in 1998 to provide bursaries, support and mentoring for FE students from disadvantaged backgrounds who progress to University. I am also Chair of E-ACT, the second largest multi-academy sponsor in England. I was Chair of the I believe I have learnt to be a The place God calls you is National Extension College humbler, a more effective, and a the place where your deep Cambridge, a forerunner of the kinder person over the last few OU, from 1998 to 2011, Chair of gladness and the world's years. I do genuinely ‘think it Student Volunteering England deep hunger meet. possible I may be mistaken’ from 2005-2009 and the Anne where previously I would have Frank Trust from 2006-2012. I Frederick Buchner known I’d be right. I receive am also Patron of MK Women consistent unbidden positive and Work and women’s issues feedback from people I am remain a lifelong concern for me working with to reinforce my although I have never embraced own view that I am a better leader (as a Chair or been publicly involved in gay issues or what is these days) because I am more relaxed, less now referred to as the LGBT agenda. driven, more objective; and I have more time for I am interested in the arts, creative and cultural other people which means I can give them more skills and sport and undertake a considerable thought, care and prayer. amount of voluntary work to support people and organizations in these areas. I was Chair of Milton Keynes Arts for Health from 2005-2011; The sixth decade ‘remember your am currently a Trustee of The Stables – in which responsibilities as a citizen for the conduct of capacity I chair the biennial MK International local national and international affairs’ Festival; I chaired the successful city-wide MK 2018 consortium as part of England’s bid for the So how do I put my faith into practice these days? FIFA Football World Cup and I have recently I divide my work into two categories – unpaid performed the same role for the Rugby World and paid - with the former consuming by far the Cup in 2015. majority of my time. I am also involved in the world of politics at a national level, specifically for the Labour Party where I sit on the 1000 Club Development Board and the Shadow Ministerial Skills Task Force and I chair the national Women’s Board. I also provide coaching and mentoring to a number Shadow Cabinet Ministers and Junior Ministers.
My voluntary work is almost entirely for charities. It’s mostly work as a Trustee or Chair and I specialize in governance, strategy and performance management. I believe that a lot of charities are poorly governed, lack strategic thinking and rarely do effective performance management - of staff or Trustees - and so I can ’add value’ (as they say) to organizations by providing them with expertise they need, can’t often find and certainly can’t afford.
So the interests of my youth - the arts, feminism, psychology, diversity and political activism - have prevailed over the last 5 decades - to which has been consciously added the dimension of faith so
I work mainly for educational charities, and 15
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So it is that whilst I have always put my faith into action on the larger national stage as well as in my local community, in the last few years I have, in the phrase from Advices and Queries, particularly remembered my ‘ responsibilities as
noticeably absent from my formative years. In terms of overt ‘faith’ work, I served as Chair of the National Council of Faiths and Beliefs for a decade from 2001-11 and had a wonderful time mixing and working with a fantastic range of people from different faith traditions and backgrounds – particularly at a time under the previous government when ‘community cohesion’ was in vogue.
a citizen for the conduct of local, national and international affairs’ and it was great fun to have this acknowledged with the award of the OBE, even though we all know this kind of thing, as my niece says, is ‘Only a Bit of Embellishment’. The seventh decade: ‘Attend to what love
A couple of years ago, I became involved in Quakers in Britain working nationally and currently serve on Quaker Peace & Social Witness Central Committee (QPSWCC) and Meeting for Sufferings (MfS). I am enjoying this work immensely and getting a huge amount from it – although it does consume a considerable amount of time, too – including a significant number of residential weekends which means that I miss meeting for worship in MK but gain from (and, I hope, give to) Quakers nationally.
requires of you, which may not be great busyness’ As I will turn 60 in three week’s time, you might be wondering if I’m ready to hang up my boots and spend more time in the garden and kitchen. I certainly like to be out in the garden and I love my kitchen and cooking but I have always found time for these things and I can’t see them becoming full-time occupations as I cross the threshold into my seventh decade of life. In preparing the material for MFIP, however, I have taken some time to reflect on my life so far and also on the future. It has been a delight and privilege for me to look back on how much ‘my faith in practice’ has evolved over the last 15-20 years within MK Quaker meeting.
My paid work consists primarily of one-to-one leadership coaching with young leaders from the public, private and voluntary sectors – which draws upon my own executive experience as a leader as well as my psychodynamic therapy training - and non-executive board work at a national level in the fields of housing and the environment which is similar to my charity board and committee work, but for which I am remunerated. As a result of both my paid and unpaid work, I am frequently asked to take part in public speaking engagements – an activity I quite evidently have no difficulty in undertaking.
This is an edited version of Ann's talk, the full text of which is available from her or the editor. A collection of My Faith in Practice talks is to be published shortly.
'A rare and precious thing'?: the views of some members of Milton Keynes Quaker Meeting Twenty-three responses were received to a questionnaire put out last year which asked members and attenders of Milton Keynes Meeting in an open-ended way to reflect on the positive and negative aspects of MK Meeting, in the light of the forthcoming visit of the
Recording Clerk as part of the national 'vibrant meetings' project. The responses were coded into themes. Below is an extract from the findings. Further extracts 16
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may be published in future newsletters. The full paper is available from Don Rowe.
by the demands of living a worthwhile and meaningful life which though trivial and ephemeral at one level, at another can be understood in terms of eternal values and truths. It enables me to set aside as unimportant issues relating to the existence or not of other worlds, in order to make the best of this one.
What was appreciated about Quakerism in general Respondents were asked to talk about what they appreciate about Quakerism in general and the Milton Keynes Meeting more particularly. Some saw complete continuity between the Quakerism of Britain Yearly Meeting and its local manifestation. For example,
And yet the corporate nature of Quakerism was also appreciated. One respondent put his appreciation of the corporate nature of Quakerism in a possibly unusual way:
I treasure being part of a Quaker community (locally, nationally and internationally) which shares my most fundamental ethical approach to life; I feel I don’t then have to ‘explain’ myself because I am already largely comprehended. It is a community which respects difference, embraces newcomers, values compassion, seeks first to understand rather than condemn, encourages us to stretch ourselves emotionally rather than wither into mean-spiritedness or ‘judgmentalness’, and it is one in which I can feel inspired, supported, upheld, and (mostly) ‘safe’.
Quakers create meaning. Not just any meaning: what I particularly value is the intent to create goodness. I think and hope that this intent and the meaning it brings forth also brings forth us, and in particular, me. Another Friend felt that Quakerism holds a healthy balance between the individual and the corporate body: It emphasises [...] discipline – the discipline of the group. This is healthy. [...] It encourages individuality but not at the expense of the group’s wisdom.
Another Friend put it like this:
The openness of Quakerism was commonly discussed in responses. This term seemed to apply to a range of issues from doctrinal ones, on the one hand, to attitudes and matters including gender and sexuality on the other. Lack of pressure to believe things on no other grounds than the authority of the ‘church’ was appreciated:
Quakerism is the way I have chosen for my life’s journey: the experience of and the search for ‘that of God’ is essential. It gives me endless challenge to explore and develop, to allow vulnerability, to gain strength and courage. Some respondents saw the openness of British Liberal Quakerism, with its lack of dogma, and acceptance of a range of spiritual ‘languages’ as an important element which enabled them to be authentic, true to themselves, whilst remaining in touch with a worshipping community:
MK meeting is ‘a place I can be’ without the need to think, feel, say or do in accordance with any code. And another attender appreciated the fact that Quakerism gave him what he felt was a:
I believe that everyone has spiritual needs but that these days the language and form of traditional religious practices and dogmas have led many to believe that faith is not possible without a belief in what I believe are imaginary, supernatural worlds. Liberal Quakerism to my mind, offers me a spiritual heritage which nurtures me and helps me to focus the mind/heart on the deep, eternal questions posed by the human condition and
more open way of thinking. And yet the openness of Quakerism was not seen in terms of a flabby, meaningless uncertainty about what is important in life: I really appreciate that fact that Quakers are non-dogmatic in terms of the great 17
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supernatural narratives of ‘salvation’ and ‘enlightenment’ – and yet, at the same time, the focus of Quakerism, as actually lived by Friends, is one in which the spiritual dimension to life is understood to be everywhere, imminent, made real through the lives of people as they seek to build a world based on eternal principles of love, truth, justice, mercy, and equality.
There is a rootedness: a connection to a tradition (and the linking in to other faiths and traditions). Such continuity seems to allow some Friends to live both in the cultural and spiritual (postDarwinian, post-Freudian) present whilst at the same time drawing inspiration and guidance from the past:
Openness to all regardless of sexuality was also appreciated:
I appreciate the Quaker traditions which in the 17th century sought to rediscover the stance which Jesus took against religious hypocrisy, power-seeking and inequality. At the same time, I believe that Eastern religious traditions have much to say about the journey inward and living spiritual lives – lives which express spiritual and ethical values.
Thank you for Milton Keynes Meeting – it is welcoming, inclusive and open. And the following person emphasised characteristics like openness as having a profound influence on her personhood: This meeting is central to my life here. It is at the core of who I AM. I value: its dynamism,
For several respondents, the value of Friends’ the seeking, the open-mindedness, the clearly acceptance all in tan Testimonies shines through in … their writing, as e.g. in the following:
And this open nature of Quakerism – open to diversity and freedom from restricting dogmas was thought by the following respondent to be a key element of Quakerism’s appeal today:
What I appreciate and value about our Meeting is what I appreciate and value about Quakerism as a whole. The Quaker ideals of Peace, Equality, Freedom, Truth, Simplicity and Justice speak to me – as they must to everyone. I feel pride in Quakers, in their early fight against slavery and in their achievements.
I think that Meeting continues to grow because there is a yearning for stillness, to get away from materialism, to engage with the spiritual side of life, to find what makes sense on a personal level without having to follow dogma and a format that one does not fully believe in.
Another Friend put it this way: Many of the ‘concerns’ that Quakers are involved in are important to me, including issues to do with equality, justice, peace which impact on society at large. I can relate to and empathise with so many of the issues. The challenge is where to place one’s energies. The testimonies and concerns provide many opportunities to express one’s Quakerism in a practical as well as in a spiritual way. I value this aspect of the Religious Society of Friends.
Nonetheless, the notion that Quakerism is free from dogma does not equate to the idea that it has no roots or traditions: It is spiritually without dogma and therefore perfectly suited to this day and age. It has its roots in Christianity, which helps me because that is my background. Yet in Britain it is acknowledged that (put crudely) the Bible may not be the final word from God. We continue to be seekers/Friends of the Truth.
And for another Friend, it was important that Quakerism translates beliefs into social action: it emphasises action, living out what one believes, discipline – the discipline of the group. This is healthy.
The notion that modern Quakerism does have its roots in more traditional doctrinal teaching is clearly appreciated by a number of respondents:
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Related to its tradition and beliefs, e.g. in equality, some aspects of Quaker ways of working were singled out for appreciation, including:
I had attended Quaker meetings before – in Surrey and in Shropshire – but this was the first one I was able to attend on a regular basis. It confirmed for me that I was in fact ‘already’ a Quaker and I applied for membership within eighteen months.
The way everything is structured and works with no sense of hierarchy. And for another Friend, the business method was a highly valued aspect of Quakerism:
A somewhat similar sentiment is offered in describing the Meeting as ‘safe’ :
I’ve been impressed by the quality of the business method and approaches to problem solving such as the highly supportive structures on offer in Meetings for Clearness. These are so far removed from the oppositional, point-scoring debating styles which characterise so much of our public life.
I know where I am with Quakers. I feel safe and at peace among them. I can trust them. And it is this Meeting which inspires that. Home is where one’s family can be found and a strong strand in these data clusters around the idea of the value of finding like-minded persons with whom one can undertake one’s spiritual journey. This is one example:
Quakerism as a spiritual ‘home’ Several respondents spoke of the good fit between themselves as spiritual beings and the Meeting or the Society:
The discovery that I am not alone and completely mad in exploring the possibility of the Kingdom of Heaven here and now. There are others, equally mad, who call themselves “Quakers” and whom I can call friends.
I have been attending for ten years. It was like coming home. And another Friend described the feeling of having already been a Quaker in spirit before discovering the society:
[To be continued...]
Someone said, " a family is like a patchwork quilt" and so is our Meeting. This wonderful piece of work now adorns the table in the Meeting Room when we are not using it. Our very grateful thanks to Dru Ellis and Laura Weavers for the vision, the energy and the skill to make this happen.
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CALENDAR OF EVENTS March - May 2013 March
April
May
Weds 20th
12.45-1.30pm
Midweek Meeting for Worship - Committee Room
Thurs 21st
7.30-9.30pm
Book Group – Meet in Library.
Sun 24th
1.00 pm
Simplicity Lunch
Tues 26th
2-4pm
Craft Group – Meet in Library.
Thurs 28th
7.30-9.30pm
“Letting Our Lives Speak” – Money.
Sun 31st
12-1pm
Enquirer’s gathering - Committee Room (if there are takers)
Weds 3rd
12.45-1.30pm
Midweek Meeting for Worship - Committee Room
Sun 7th
12-1pm
Business Meeting.
14th
1.00 pm
Trevor Evans will speak on United Nations Association
Tues 9th
2-4pm
Craft Group – Meet in Library.
Thurs 11th
7.30-9.30pm
“Letting Our Lives Speak” – Public Life & Politics.
Weds 17th
12:45-1:30pm
Midweek Meeting for Worship Committee Room.
7.30 pm
Preparation for Yearly Meeting session 1
Thurs 18th
7.30pm
Book Group – Meet in Library.
Fri 19th
5-6.30pm
Bible Book Group – Committee Room.
Sat 20th
10am-2pm
Community Spring Clean of the Meeting House.
Sun 21st
9.30 - 10.15 am
Guided Meditation
Tues 23rd
2-4pm
Craft Group - Meet in Library
Sun 28th
12-1pm
Enquirer’s gathering - Committee Room.
Weds 1st
12.45 – 1.30pm
Midweek Meeting for Worship - Committee Room
7.30 pm
Preparation for Yearly Meeting session 2
Sun 5th
12-1pm
Business Meeting.
Tues 7th
2-4pm
Craft Group - Meet in Library
Sun 12th
2 - 5 pm
Area Meeting at Berkhamsted
Weds 15th
12.45-1.30pm
Midweek Meeting for Worship - Committee Room
Thurs 16th
7.30pm
Book Group – Meet in the Library.
Fri 17th
5-6.30pm
Bible Book Group – Committee Room.
Tues 21st
2-4pm
Craft Group - Meet in Library
Sun 26th
12pm – 1pm
Enquirer’s gathering - Committee Room. 20
