hard it's going to be and how stressed out you're going to get, yet nothing can stop you ... time isn't about "them" any
Planning a wedding is a lot like having a baby. Everyone warns you how hard it’s going to be and how stressed out you’re going to get, yet nothing can stop you from looking at the future with rose-colored glasses on.” ~ Elizabeth Mitchell
Does this sound familiar? "I really thought that planning a wedding was something we were going to do together! In reality, though, he hardly ever gives his opinion. It's always like, 'Whatever you want babe." — Tiffany We have been photographing weddings and engagements for over ten years. And over that time, we have listened to couples talk about how weeks into their engagement, they were suddenly fighting A LOT - when before, they had never really fought AT ALL. They talk about how their time isn't about "them" any more, it's all about "the wedding." Or about how hard it is to try and figure out everything at once. " It's just too much." One groom to be said, "W e aren't professional event planners! After we got engaged, we discovered that wedding planning was a part time job that neither of us really knew what to do." …..…………………………………………………………………… www.patchworkphotography.com
Linen vs paper napkins. Is this pink or blush? Open bar? DJ vs a band? Cupcakes or sheet cakes? First dance song? Last dance song? Should we get your step-dad's girlfriends' sister a wrist corsage? And the list goes on and on. It doesn't take long before the stress of making so many decisions soon begins to bleed into other areas of life and couples find they are bickering over stupid little things.
Listen to this bride: “This weekend we went “wedding shopping,” and I swear we weighed 1,000 lbs collectively. We smelled hundreds of flowers and tasted 10 different types of white cake. We toured venues we couldn't afford and discussed budgets we didn't have. We talked about vendors we hadn't secured and stared at a future wedding with more questions than answers. Where's the champagne and the dreaming? This is NOT what we thought this would be like."
We know it can be different. …..…………………………………………………………………… www.patchworkphotography.com
//01: COMMUNICATION HAS TO BE A PRIORITY
Communication is the key to any good relationship. You and your partner may have expectations that they may be totally unaware of. Telling your partner what you expect is not wrong - - it’s necessary. Don’t be afraid to share with your partner what you anticipate the wedding day to look like and then work together to create realistic plans for not only the wedding day, but for your future together.
//02: DON’T JUDGE
Reign in the eye roll. Hold back the laughter. Believe it or not, there may be many common wedding traditions that your partner may be unfamiliar with. So, when in a conversation, do not keep a non-judgmental approach to what your partner says.
…..…………………………………………………………………… www.patchworkphotography.com
//03: LISTEN: SHOW GENUINE INTEREST
The best thing you and your partner can do is develop the ability to sincerely listen to each other. Although I did not let my husband get his way with having ice cream cake at our wedding reception, I did have it waiting for him as a surprise back in our hotel room. Also, know that there are things that each of you may not have a strong opinion about, but that does not mean that the other does not care about you.. So, don’t be so quick to get angry if he simply responds with a shrug when you ask which stationary would be best to print the save the dates on.
//04: GET SILLY
Laugh. Once engaged, everyone seems to have an opinion about what your wedding should look like, but don’t lose yourselves in the planning. Talking naturally about some silly and maybe even foolish ideas. Be together. Try new things. And laugh some more.
…..…………………………………………………………………… www.patchworkphotography.com
//05: KEEP CONVERSATIONS BROADER THAN WEDDING PLANNING It is easy to lose time on thinking about who gets to sit with who at the church or the reception. Try to talk with your fiancée about your post wedding plans and how you will spend your life together. The wedding is only one day, your marriage lasts a lifetime. Creating a deeper relationship takes work every day. Be kind, have patience, a continue to talk.
…..…………………………………………………………………… www.patchworkphotography.com
One groom said it best, “Life didn’t ask if we wanted plenty of money and steady jobs as we looked for our first home together. It didn’t consider the fact that while looking for a home, and a job, and trying to answer huge questions about our lives and our future, that addressing and stuffing wedding invitations just might send us RIGHT OVER THE EDGE. Engagement hasn’t been a string of champagne toasts, or a pile of presents (not yet anyway), but it has taught me something profound. Life isn’t easy, and it doesn’t stop in the name of love. But the beauty of marriage is that you get to go through it all together.”
You might be months or years away from your wedding date, but your engagement marks the moment when you have made the first vow to start walking together. Love together, laugh together, live life . . . together. In the end, that is what the wedding is really all about. If you’re finding yourself stressed and overwhelmed, and maybe even a little frustrated with your fiancé, give yourselves a break! We have compiled a list of FABULOUS date ideas on our blog. Come check them out!
Enjoy being engaged: More on the Blog >> …..…………………………………………………………………… www.patchworkphotography.com
