Introduction Research questions Background Method ...

An exploration of gender preference, perceptions and adaptation of parenting practices among South Asian immigrants in the United States Rubab I. Qureshi MD PhD • Patricia Hindin PhD, CNM, CLC • Sabrina M. Chase PhD

Introduction

Method

Immigration poses unique challenges for parents from South Asia by juxtaposing their cultural beliefs with a different set of values which can create occasion for intergenerational conflict and tensions within families, for example cultural concerns may lead to the differential treatment of girls. Studies indicate that such conflicts may arise when marriages are arranged or forced (Anitha & Gill, 2009). However, there is a paucity of literature on the cultural concerns of immigrant South Asian parents, how immigration influences their parenting and their adaptation to a new cultural context.

Qualitative method with open ended interviews

Research questions The current study investigates how Pakistani emigres raise their daughters and how child-rearing techniques have changed among immigrant families since their arrival in the United States.

Background According to the 2010 Census there were 363,699 people of (self-identified) Pakistani origin living in the United States, with the largest numbers residing in New York, Texas, California, Illinois, New Jersey and Virginia. Nearly half were foreign-born. The size of this population was almost double the size as recorded by the 1990 census. A review of the literature on cultural adaptation found that immigrants from Pakistan may adhere to ‘old fashioned values’ (Shaw, 2004, p. 274) and their integration into the host society may be slow (Qureshi, 2010; Shaw, 2004). Shakari (2013) found greater religiosity among immigrant Pakistani youth compared to the older immigrant family members. Even though there was increased religiosity, there was greater labor force participation among Pakistani immigrant women. In addition there was some blurring of traditional gender roles in immigrant families although the patriarchal structure persisted (Qureshi, 2010; Shakari, 2013).

Sample Census 2000 data were used to identify locations in New Jersey with the highest Pakistani immigrant populations. 26 Pakistani immigrant mothers were recruited from these areas by snowball technique, a technique for gathering research subjects through the identification of an initial subject who introduces to other participants.

Setting Homes of the participants in urban and suburban New Jersey.

Data collection Open ended interviews

Data analysis Interview data was transcribed. Content analysis was conducted and themes were generated.

Credibility and Transferability To increase the credibility and transferability several techniques were used: prolonged engagement, persistent observation, triangulation, and peer debriefing (Guba & Lincoln, 1989). Rapport was developed with the participants by prolonged interaction. Interviews were conducted in multiple sittings and follow up telephone conversations. The taped and transcribed interview excerpts were analyzed by a native language speaker for content and expression. Thematic analysis was conducted by the researcher and her dissertation committee member independently to triangulate and verify themes. Themes were discussed with participants and colleagues for congruence. Thick descriptions were used to address transferability.

Participants

Findings

Sample 26 Median age 38 Average number of children 4 Girls 29 Boys 40 Average years married 14 Average Years in U.S. 12 Educational Attainment High school 5 Bachelor’s 17 Master’s 4 Table 1. Description of the sample. The sample of 26 women, although small, was similar in demographics to the Pakistani immigrant community in New Jersey. They shared social and economic characteristics as confirmed by Census 2000 data analysis. The sample consisted of mothers who were educated, a combination of home makers and those who were employed and originated from various locations in Pakistan.

Theme 1. Mothers’ Gender Role Socialization in Pakistan Participants grew up in homes where gender differences began at birth. The birth of their brothers and male cousins was celebrated with greater festivities; brothers were responsible for their sisters’ welfare and enjoyed greater freedoms. Daughters were cherished but their transitory abode in their parents’ homes was understood as the norm. Investment in their futures was based on gender and was determined by gender roles. Their brothers were assumed to be the future breadwinners and heads of their households, expected to care for parents in their old age and contribute to their sisters’ marriages whereas girls were going to marry and become mothers. Most of the participants’ mothers started assembling dowries early on and marrying their daughters took precedence over other considerations such as education, while investing in their son’s education was a means to ensure future security.

My mother collected beautiful stuff for my marriage. She started soon after I was born. She collected embroidered bed covers, dinner sets and gold jewelry. (Participant #1) I finished my matric [10th grade]…. barely so. You know girls’ education is not as important as boys’. It is not like I was going to work after marriage anyway. (Participant #2)

Subtheme: Gender preference for boys I did not have a preference for a boy or a girl, but in Pakistani society they prefer boys. I might have wished in my heart somewhere, but Alhamdolillah [all praise is for Allah] I did not really wish for any particular sex. It was the first baby so it did not matter if it was boy or girl. I did not make any mannat [wish]. (Participant #19)

Theme 2. ‘Daughters will not listen’ Most of the women perceived too many cultural differences and felt that it was demanding to raise children, particularly girls, in the United States. Many participants were fearful of raising their daughters in a society so different from Pakistan where they felt they would lose control over a range of issues. They felt that their daughters would not ‘listen’ to them when it came to dressing modestly, limiting interactions with boys, not dating and complying to arranged marriages.

I don’t think, if I had a daughter that she would listen to me. I mean she would want to dress like the girls around her. I will be telling her to wear longer shirts that covered her back and not to wear deep neck shirts. I wear a scarf all the time. No, not a hijab [full head covering] just a scarf so that my chest area is covered, but would a daughter listen? (Participant # 5)

Subtheme: Differential parenting for boys and girls Dating was discouraged. Alcohol consumption was taboo but the rules were somewhat relaxed for boys when it came to other behaviors such as attending a party with boys and girls, staying out late, smoking and shopping alone. Girls needed protection and their behavior was considered a reflection upon the family. There was greater stress on girls to attend Sunday schools and take part in religious gatherings.

Boys do all kinds of things. Stay out late, but I cannot imagine what I would do if my daughter came home late. It is alright for boys but girls have to be protected by the family. (Participant #5) Although both sons and daughters attended Sunday school, the mothers wanted to make sure their daughters were immersed in religious education because they felt that the girls would carry those traditions into their new families after marriage.

Theme 3. Adapting Religious Practices of the Family Most of these women reported higher degree of adherence to religious practices in the US compared with their life in Pakistan. Membership in mosques and Sunday Schools was high and some of these women adhered to the rules of hijab. Most taught and encouraged young children to offer the five obligatory prayers as a means for ingraining a habit. Most adhered to a halal diet and children brought lunches to school from home.

“Who would have thought I would be in a mosque this often”. (Participant # 10)

The mosques also served as institutions for religious education for children: Sunday schools.

Alhamdolillah [all praise for Allah], my children attend two days, Saturday and Sunday, of Islamic School. They are taught the basic tenets such as the five pillars of Islam: salat [prayer], fasting [in the month of Ramazan], zakat [obligatory payment of a portion of income to deserving poor] hajj [pilgrimage to Mecca once in lifetime] and shahada [the oneness of Allah]. They are taught about the fiqah and tajweed [reading the Quran with proper Arabic enunciation] (Participant # 16).

Subtheme: Language preservation All women stressed the preservation of their mother tongue. In contrast they reported that they grew up in Pakistan where English speaking was encouraged and preferred.

Discussion Pakistani culture (and society), with its roots in Islamic culture, exerts great social controls which is apparent in gender segregation, arranged marriages and definitions of modesty. Although immigration loosened some of these constraints e.g. women finding employment, employment not considered a male pursuit, greater independence of women, most social controls were preserved to ensure a perpetuation of their culture. This was manifested in adaptation strategies of gender preference, differential parenting, adaptation of religious practices and language preservation. There were salient differences between the cultural practices of the participants and their own upbringing in Pakistan. Perceiving a threat to their tradition these women cultivated a more religious and observant lifestyle and fostered an environment where their children would be exposed to traditional Islamic teachings. This

aspiration was also reflected in their parenting practices. The high attendance at mosques, Sunday schools and more religious practices at home were geared towards controlling their children and a fear of losing that control. Furthermore, there were differences when it came to parenting girls and boys. The attitude of mothers was a preference for boys and more protective feelings when it came to girls. Girls were expected to carry traditions into their own families after marriage. Adaptation refers to the strategies used during acculturation and it’s outcomes (Berry, 2005). Most of the participants exhibited some degree of assimilation by selectively adapting to the larger societal culture.

Limitations Reflexivity was addressed by narrative style interviews, independent analysts in the transcription phase and coding and analyses phases of data analyses.

References Anitha, S., & Gill, A. (2009). Coercion, Consent and the Forced Marriage Debate in the UK. Feminist Legal Studies, 17(2), 165-184. doi:10.1007/s10691-009-9119-4 Berry, J. W. (2005). Acculturation: Living successfully in two cultures. International journal of intercultural relations, 29(6), 697-712. Guba, E. G., & Lincoln, Y. S. (1989). Fourth generation evaluation. Newbury Park, Calif.: Sage Publications.

Rutgers, The State University of New Jersey